#dont steal his cows!!!

[telemmy]

Helios design i made at school as my first post in this account :]

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

[hyrulesfav]

something about being a twin but looking possibly mentally disturbed and it being attractive somehow

[princessbrunette]

would bountyhunter!rafe ever comfort you when you’re crying about missing home?

i feel like he’d be weirded out the first couple times but eventually it’d be normal for you to fall asleep in his arms

｡•┈🎀┈• ｡ﾟ

yeah, he acts all reluctant about it but he’s not totally emotionless or anything. there is a weight of guilt on his chest when he sees you all curled up by the window at the shitty little motel the two of you were holed up in. he’d been out to get a bottle of whisky — treating himself after all the strife he’d been putting himself through with this whole bounty hunting thing.

as soon as he arrives back into the room you jump up, like you’re scared of being caught crying. quickly, you paw at your eyes — sniffing up as much snot as you can as you face him nervously, swaying on your feet with wide eyes like you were expecting him to be furious with you. he slows his pace, eyeing you over.

“you were crying?” he asks as if it’s not obvious and you look away, swiping beneath your eye once more.

“jus’ had something in my eye.” you croak, heart pounding with the realisation that lying might just get you in more trouble. “dont be mad.” you utter quietly like a prayer.

“i’m not—” he realises he projected his voice just a tad too loud because you tense up, and he sighs— pushing his floppy hair out of his face. “i’m not mad. i just want to know why. was — was it me? did i say some dumb shit?” he approaches you carefully, holding his hands up when you cower slightly to show he comes in peace.

“no.” you shake your head quickly. the last thing you wanted to do was accuse him of anything, grateful of the fact he’d somewhat treated you fairly despite being the one to steal you from your land. “i… i feel homesick. i miss my father… and i miss the barn, and my sheep, and all my chickens. i miss my horse and the cows. i’m so far from home.” you stare out the window, fat droplets wobbling on the precipice of your eye.

rafe sighs, scratching at his cheek awkwardly — unsure of what he’s supposed to say. after all you were homesick because of him. he wasn’t supposed to like you, nor were you particularly supposed to like him — but there had been moments of comfort you’d found in eachother, oddly enough — and now he had really grown attached to you, debating marrying you to keep you for himself.

“yeah…” he drawls, nodding and staring at the back of you for a moment as he perches on the edge of the bed. “shit, look— c’mere.” he beckons, and you do so. you suppose you’re just being obedient to stay out of trouble, but it was undeniable that you craved his comfort. craved him.

he pulls you to sit on his leg, a hand supporting your back. “suppose i should apologise for all… this. i— i didn’t wanna have to take anyone okay it’s… its just my dad is a very powerful man. my whole life i’ve been second best to my sister and… i wanted to show him that i could do what he does. now i’ve done the job and — and it has these real life consequences and i don’t enjoy that trust me, but… what’s done is done. i’ve got you now. i… will get you a new barn. a better one. with more sheep and cows and shit. alright?”

maybe you were too empathetic, because in that moment for the first time you felt kind of sorry for rafe. he wasn’t as big and scary as he usually was. he actually seemed kind of lonely, and insecure. it wouldn’t undo the hurt he’s caused, the fact that it was very unlikely you’d see your father again — but it brought you some comfort to know you were hurting together. you sniffle, nodding in understanding and he sighs again, pulling you into him. “c’mon. stop that.” he jogs his leg a little, comforting you like you were a baby, the only way he knew how.

｡•┈🎀┈• ｡ﾟ

[inamagicalhallucination]

ok gift giving is a big part of atsushi’s love language 

this wasn’t meant to be long but-

whether its becuz the tiger’s cat-desire to hunt for the agency translated to something more human (along with cooking but my cooking atsushi headcanons will pop out sometime else) or just becuz atsushi has never been gifted anything pre-agency and to him its something very precious who knows

it’s not that he spends ages pouring over what to give the agency members (well not always) its more like if he goes to the store and sees a type of candy ranpo likes he’ll buy it for him

when atsushi’s new at wanting to give his loved ones gifts, he does over think it tho cmon its atsushi

like he’ll see a nice pen, buy it for kunikida, but then he’ll feel like its such a dumb little thing and he should’ve put more effort into a gift because of that he ends up hoarding a lot of trinkets becuz he’ll see them and buy them as presents but be too shy to give them up

(and he’ll also spend ages pouring over what the perfect present for everyone would be but always finding some fault in his ideas)

it’s not until dazai’s breaking into atsushi’s apartment to teach him the joys of stealing other people’s credit cards that he notices a neat stack of containers with atsushi’s friends and stuff’s name on it and asks atsushi about it that something ever happens

dazai: don’t tell me atsushi, you were planning on chopping us all up and storing us into these containers ? u’d need bigger ones for that by the way

atsushi, horrified: WHAT?? of course not!!! these are-

atsushi, flustered: these are just things that i dont know i bought becuz i thought you’d like them. but theyre silly so i didn’t give-

dazai, already opening his own box: ATSUSHI!

atsushi, trying to pull him away: what

dazai, pulling out a tiny void eyed black cat keychain: did you buy this for me? how did you know i wanted it?

atsushi:

atsushi: you wanted it?

dazai, lying but atsushi doesn’t need to know that: yeah i wanted something like this. how cruel atsushi, buying it and storing it away~ not giving it to me :(

atsushi, pleased and happy: do you um want to look at the other stuff ?

//

so essentially dazai in his own strange way of not actually addressing the problem convinces atsushi to give his silly little gifts to the agency members

(and tho he did not want anything like the keychain before, he’s quite pleased by it and all the other things that atsushi got for him)

so atsushi in a moment of joy and happiness places all the containers in front of each members door with his name signed and bolts (kyouka’s is placed near her stuff right before he leaves since he wakes up before her) (things for non-agency members like lucy are left in places where they work/hang out a lot) (fukuzawa’s in front of his office doors)

//

the morning at work, atsushi’s shaking with nervousness 

the first one to arrive after him is kunikida (who’s usually the first to arrive)

kunikida greets atsushi politely - theres something about him that seems different, a little red on his cheeks but atsushi cant tell what; he’s too busy being relieved that kunikida isn’t upset about his gifts

when kunikida opens his book, the pen he pulls out is the one atsushi gifted him and atsushi is immediately filled with warmth and contentment (when he moves his head, atsushi notices that his hair is tied with the ribbon atsushi gave him)

kunikida doesn’t say anything but his gratitude and his appreciation for atsushi’s gifts is clear (also he may or may not ruffle atsushi’s hair more than usual that day)

//

after kunikida and dazai’s appreciation, atsushi is more excited about everyone’s reactions

junichiro is flustered and pleased and thanks him profusely, grinning the entire day - naomi tells him about each gift and why she likes it 

kenji tries to gift him a cow which is banned from the office by kunikida - who points out that atsushi wouldn’t know what to do with it, so kenji comes back with chickens, and then after the same thing happens, gives atsushi stuff from his garden

haruno and the other staff all thank atsushi with hugs or shoulder pats

ranpo doesn’t look at atsushi as he approaches him but he’s wearing the pins atsushi bought him and the fact that he’s holding out a candy for atsushi to take is telling enough

yosano thanks him fiddling with the bracelet atsushi bought

kyouka apologizes for not giving him anything and atsushi has to explain to her that he’s just getting gifts becuz he wants to not becuz he wants them to give hm something back 

fukuzawa does the old person affection thing by placing his hand on atsushi head ya know the thing

anyway

lucy is blushing when he goes down to the cafe and calls him dumb and then gives him extra cake so-

//

the only person who atsushi’s bought gifts for but hasn’t given them to is akutagawa

their relationship isn’t as hostile as before but atsushi doesn’t know what to do with it but he thinks theres a tiny chance that akutagawa might like them so he makes up his mind and ships them to him (he does not include a return address or his name)

akutagawa, climbing through atsushi’s window a few days later: it was you wasn’t it?

atsushi: stop climbing through my window asshole????

akutagawa, coughing and showing atsushi the black bracelet atsushi got him: answer me

atsushi, remembering the gifts, flushing: wh-what ? noooo-  I uh. I mean i don’t know what you’re talking about

akutagawa: it has to be you. no one else would give me something as strange as a plastic skeleton

atsushi, weakly: it fit ur aesthetic ?

akutagawa, ‘glaring’ at him: 

atsushi: ...sorry?

akutagawa, looking away, coughing, ears red: whatever. i don’t like being in debt. tell me what you want, i’ll buy it for u

atsushi: oh no no no. you don’t have to do that! honest. it was just a few silly things that reminded me of... you... r u okay ur face’s red

akutagawa, grabbing atsushi and pulling him towards the window: shut up im buying u dinner

atsushi, very confused: ok?

anyway yeah

might add a part 2 becuz i wasn’t gonna post the start of atsushi giving gifts but just him giving ppl gifts but i cant help myself

also howd akutagawa get here

[iwannascreameurekaa]

pjo characters as quotes from my classmates, parents, siblings, and grandparents.

Yipee

Will: "does anybody need the heim-ill-ick?”

Hazel (prob to Nico): “i’ve never smoked… EVER. and if you smoke, i’ll hit you.”

Percy: “he looks like a street person?”

Leo: “i thought i got salt and pepper, turns out it was salt and salt.”

Piper: “i’ve never been attached to a cat.”  

Hazel: “The power of INTERNET👹”

Frank: “that was rude.” 

Percy: “every cat that doesn’t have a tail is named bobby.”

Piper: “just put your coins in your bucket.”

Jason: “if i was barbie, my feet would hurt all the time”

Nico: “it’s giving me skin cancer as we speak.”

Hazel: “she told me to give her when i die so i thought i might as well give it to her now.”

Piper: “did you steal my brush again? quit stealing my brush you little brush thief!”

Percy: “you’ve got 4 of grandma!”

Leo: “i’m a heavy drinker today” *takes a sip of his fourth glass of water*

Annabeth: “you squeezed her so hard she dropped a cheerio.” 

Leo: “and thoust asked if Jason was a cracker(a white person) and Jason replied”no i’m at least 2 or 3 whole crackers since there’s quite a bit more of me than you”

Hazel: "ohhhh my goodness don’t put your feet in her face.”

Leo talking about Piper: "she is a luddite, against technology, close with the Amish community."

Piper looking Leo and Jason directly in the eyes: “no dying allowed in here”

Percy after TOA: “if somebody wants to steal my car, i want them to steal it! not come in my house, shoot me, take my keys, and then take the car. LET ME SLEEP I DONT CARE!”

Will: “me and Nico go on dates to funeral homes”

Hazel: “you have a problem with a joint?” She was talking about her elbow 😭

Leo: “if i get hungry, rats will get skinned.”

Piper: “if this truck goes any slower it’ll have to put out a mailbox.”

Annabeth: “oh you stepped on the cow? well it’s better than the cow stepping on you”

Frank: “and it just sucked the carpet right up”

Hazel "back in my day" Levesque: “i had a lot of beagles when i was young, and finally i had one that lived.”

Leo: “are you looking for regular markies?”

Jason: “i’m gonna go to work tomorrow with a hangover.”

Will: “i’m not very artistic(autistic)”

Jason: “i never added salt to the pepper”

Piper: “keep your toes to yourself”

Piper: “you guys are an embarrassment.”

Jason: "can you pass the salt? i like my stuff salty”

Will: "The only Christian song I know is let it go" 

Context for the next one: my friend had a slick back high pony tail when we had this conversation so that gives you a visual of what Piper was

Leo "what's your next album gonna be called?"

Piper: "'my hair is straighter than my friend'."

Leo: 😦

Piper: "What in the gay man!"

Hazel: "If you stop being a karen then maybe you would actually be successful at life"

Piper: "You should start day dreaming about getting a husband"

Annabeth: "George Washington is the off brand version of me"

Hazel: "Ideas were such good ideas they became the symbol for ideas"

Leo: "did you mean lightbulbs"

Hazel: "..... yes"

Piper: "There's a fly on your butt" *waves at it and it flies away* "that's not your property sir"

Leo: "Yeah you gotta pay for that"

Nico: "Does he have a speech impediment?" 

Will: "He has a brain impediment"

Jason: "I bet he was having Funtime"

Piper: "why do you always say Funtime"

Jason: "I'm not saying sex!"

Leo prob to his tool belt: *suggestive voice* "give me that minty mint"

Leo to Hazel, who doesn't know what any modern slang means: "check it homeslice"

Hazel: "the gambling may run in the family, but at least pokers fun!"

Leo: "im a turkey... cock cock!"

that's all I have rn lmao

[lordoftablecloths]

I’m curious my beloved mutual! Where does he get the other parts for the creature from?! Can’t sleep until I know!!!

OHOHOHOHOHOHOHO YOU DARE ASK ?!?!?!?!

(twirls hair and kicks legs back and forth) okay so Victor-

He takes the left eye, scalp, and some thigh muscles from The Condemned Man

He takes (steals) the brain from a (literature) professor that died and donated his body to science upon overhearing the fact from some other students (i might draw a scene of that)

He takes the heart from a slaughterhouse cow (cow hearts a very large but are very similar to human hearts, and the creature is meant to be 8 feet tall and proportionally large, so...... also he has a literal big heart for his big soul <3)

sheep lungs #sheeplungs

also im going to not so subtley steal this concept from the movie Victor Frankenstein (2015) but he gives the creature two sets of lungs

tee hee :3

dont ask me about organ rejection mary shelly didnt question it so neither am i (though to be fair organ transplants werent really a thing until the mid 1900s)

[dramaturgydrakes]

Hnmmm I’m bad at asking questions but I want to know more about baby!hermes AU/any headcanons you have for epic!hermes so uhh use this ask to shameless share stuff

ok ok i dont actually have too much cuz its like 6am BUT.

rebabied hermes AU

he has a cow plushie. possibly made by penelope? either way it’s funny

ABSOLUTELY tried to steal ody’s cattle first thing. ended with anti-hermes measures aided by apollo

has woken up ody and pen several times playing the lyre like a guitar in the middle of the night. for funsies.

while he’s very bold, he’s also very easily spooked. bolts faster than a cat at sudden movements and loud noises (realizing my hermes is very catlike help)

notoriously known for “if you can’t find him, he’s causing trouble.” ody and pen will search the palace for him for hours then find out him and telemachus are wreaking havoc down in the market

he can ramble for hours. either about the same thing or he jumps topics every 30 seconds. sometimes it devolves into gibberish. penelope is VERY used to this from ody and tele and able to actually engage, while ody looks at her like “?? is this what i put you through”. telemachus is “← his ass is NOT listening” but sits thru it without a problem

for the first few weeks he pretends that he has to shed feathers just to cause problems for One Specific Servant he doesn’t like. then apollo stops by like “why tf is the palace covered in baby fluff. this is unnecessary” and hermes has to actually communicate because apollo is trained to see through his bs lol

ody tries to put him in timeout and he goes “you’re MY great-grandson!! and i’m a god!!! you can’t make me do anything!! YOU go in the corner!!!!!” which earns him a very long lecture from penelope as the alternative. never fusses over timeout again and does a very good job thinking about what he’s done. as an equivalent for stickers pen just gives him interesting little baubles that have his attention for hours afterwards

despite being a small child he still traumatizes telemachus with completely unnecessary tidbits about ody. then they go cause problems together anyways

probably more later idk lol

epic / regular hermes

he’s a stoner. this is basically accepted as canon by most fans now but i digress

this is kinda more general hermes than just epic, but: i imagine that when ody was a baby he was a BIG crier—anticlea and laertes were up almost every night trying to figure out how to calm him down. then, one night, anticlea wakes to him crying, but it stops suddenly and she panics, hurrying to his room. there, instead of something terrible, she finds hermes gently dancing with baby ody and singing lullabies that apollo used to sing to him. ody is absolutely enamored with him, just staring up at hermes with the biggest, most fascinated eyes. i imagine hermes also has his facial wings aside, but baby ody doesn’t seem at all scared of having the full attention of six glowing eyes :)

every problem odysseus causes is reason for celebration. every trick, every feat, every theft—and, at the same time, every generosity to the beggars and less fortunate of his kingdom. (i mean. hermes is a patron of groups that are usually lower class hshhs)

he and apollo are besties now but apollo absolutely still has days where he wants to throttle hermes. especially when hermes brings up the cows. hermes LOVES bringing up the cows. apollo proceeds to set his clothes on fire, like any immensely irritated big brother

sad moment but hermes has so much guilt over odysseus’s suffering. he’s meant to protect travelers, and he’s granted odysseus as much luck and protection as he can, but he couldn’t protect his crew and he couldn’t spare his great-grandson from horrible anguish. i know gods in mythos care very little for mortals, but hermes just feels different to me. in the odyssey he’s very kind and benevolent, legitimately caring for odysseus from what we can tell, and seeing his family in so much pain hurts him too

he visits anticlea frequently after her death

my brain is not at functioning capacity so this is all i got but yeah :)

[beetlebug-bii]

Part 3 of feral mc but with Belphie being released from the attic. Just imagine Belphie trying to kill mc and they just bite him. Not even Barbatos could handle the child so I highly doubt Belphie could either lol.

Feral Child Mc (part three)

MC Gets Betrayed & Bombastically Side Eyed Their Way To Beating A Bitch.

A/N: I like my writing to be nothing short of silly goofy, i also wrote this at like 4am two weeks ago and was so surprised to see it in my drafts. Did i proof read it? No.

Enjoy anyways💕

Now, you have been a menace since you've arrived

Only truly unstoppable by Diavolo, Lucifer and Barbatos on a good day

Today

Was not one of those days

No

Not at all

You see

Late in the night after being very snuggly tucked in

And then duck taped to the bed

And then your pajamas stapled to the bed

And then tied to the bed

In their defense

Not a single brother has gotten a single decent night of sleep

Not since Mammon awoke one night to see your little face peeking out from the vents

You screamed at him and launched from the darkness, stealing his sun glasses before scrumbling deep into the walls

no one has ever heard Mammon scream so loudly

Needless to say they were pretty fucking done with your scrumbling

Besides, they tied Satan to the bed and look at him! A totally chill and normal member of society :D

Anyways you were built different and managed to escape

You had to check on your little friend in the attic after all, it had been a few days

Upon going in, you glared at eachother for exactly three minutes and fourteen seconds

Before he started the whole sweet act on you

"Awh hey, you can let me out now right? You can do that? Whose a good little human?"

Offense taken

You werent a dog

though you wont lie and say you havent growled back at Cerberus before...

No you know what

Who does this man think he is?

You are a child with 6 of the deadliest pacts in the world!

...

...

...

Wait a second

Who thought that was a good idea

Genuinely

You are feral

A monster

The other students at RAD cower before you

You made the Angel's cry

YOU CHOKED BARBATOS WITH A SHOE LACE

WHO IN THE 7 CIRCLES OF HELL THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA TO MAKE A PACT WITH YOU OF ALL PEOPLE

well whatever it's not like this is gonna come back and bite you

But you werent gonna release the bitch from his kennel

Not without a price

Mammon would be so so proud of you!

It took a lot of back and forth, but he promised 12 firecrackers, a new plushie, and a trip to the candy store

Hell yea candy

Open up oh magic lock

Oh he fucking kicked you across the room

Well that's not fucking candy

Lying prick

So this fucking incel loser started ranting about something or other

To be honest you didnt care

In fact you decided he didnt get a monologue

You were pissed off

You freed him

Were you the embodiment of capitalism while doing so?

Maybe

But that doesnt mean he can just hit you

Like

You have such a cute face

He's just mad that you're the baby of the family now

And that thought gave you a great idea!!

"I'm telling Lucifer"

Would have been your final words

Had you not been

Well

You.

Next thing you know he's chasing you down the stairs, grabbing you and choking you out

Which

Not gonna lie

Was a bitch move

So you kicked him square in the jaw and started screaming, just like papa lucifer taught

Stranger danger kids

Dont release strange men from the attic in exchange for candy

It's not worth it and they are lying

So obviously you pissed off what's his name

You're pretty sure its bitch boy

Anyways so you pissed off bitch boy and he started trying to stab you with a chair leg

Which was like

So rude

And the others were like bro stop

Except more panicked you're pretty sure but you werent a crybaby bitch like this loser so you know

You had to go for the knees

You slid around him, kicked him in the back of the knees

This wasnt your first rodeo

Apparently

Because you climbed on the demonic cow and grabbed the horns man

You were holding on for dear life before you just bit into his head

Like

I dont think he even knew what to do at that point

You ruined his WHOLE SPEECH

THEN FOR SOME REASON YOU GOT MAD AT HIM

gee I wonder why

THEN HIS BROTHERS SHOWED UP

THIS WASNT SUPPOSED TO BE HOW IT WENT AT ALL

PRICK

Recounting this tale now, a few months later, you'd like to think that he was just being the most frfr brother out of everyone

You two had to be torn apart like a pair of summer popsicles

You were kicking and screaming

He was kicking and screaming

Mammon was kicking and screaming, somehow his leg got caught in between you two

It was a warzone

The hallway was destroyed

Multiple bedrooms? Just gone

The brothers?

So

So tired...

None of that fake shit

Deep down you know you would've won though

You still call him bitch boy💕

[disenchanteds]

okay now ep 2

the wild card is literally they are always starving but they cannot eat normal food they have to chomp on stones and dirt and grass and wood and everything that isnt usually food and each one gives them a different effect (including poison) and they have to figure out which foods actually feed them AND THEN it gets randomised every like hour or so? (they have 3 hour recording sessions so idk exact timing so) and so they start from square one again and there was A Lot Of Death

now so every life series cows are important for food u see but then thats where all the mayhem and stealing happens and impulse goes over to gem and joel to accuse them of stealing his team's cows when they didnt and it was actually martyn but none of them know that and so the next time scott cleo pearl and impy comes over gem says "i dont like you impulse" AND THEN SHE TURNS AROUND AND SAYS TO PEARL "and i dont LOVE you because you betrayed me last season" and just the pure fact that gem said love instead of like for pearl??!? the fact that she just rounded on pearl like that even though pearl has done nothing??? *cries in despair* and now we have gempearl divorce arc

TO MAKE THINGS WORSE bdubs found out that cobblestone wall causes poison and gives it to pealr and asks her to eat it but pearl already knows what it does so bdubs asks her to give it to someone else and she tries to give it to gem but gem refused and did not want to trust her even when pearl said she would eat it with her and then pearl eventually gives up and walks away while saying "i should try this on someone else but everyone else is my ally" BUT GEM OVERHEARD IT and turns to scott who was just standing there and said "wHy would she say that SHES INSANE" even though from pearl's pov u can basically tell that pearl believed that with gem she wouldnt take the aftermath too hard and would laugh about it with pearl and then forgive her while others might not but GEM TOOK IT THE WRONG WAY AND UGHHHH

and then heres more stuff they've said on livestreams

basically gem has been playing through subnautica and there was this one scene where a person breaks up with someone else and says the line "i would like to reduce our hours together. to zero" and gem basically reacts to it by saying "wow i've never heard a breakup line so cold before...reduce our hours together to zero. i should try that line on pearl" head in hands WHY gem WHYYY

and then pearl on her stream said "why are people saying i betrayed gem when she was actively trying to kill my mounders (her alliance team) the whole time and i actually allied with scar for the last episode and never had any actual alliance with gem so really she betrayed me first" and guess what SHES RIGHT. i really need to lock them in a closet and have them talk it out i swear. and during the secret life finale even, pearl literally said to gem "lets sword it out gem lets sword it out" when pearl couldve killed gem with a bow easily and pearl is also better with an axe and has lost to gem multiple times with a sword but idt gem heard it and scar and gem were already battling it out so now we have gempearl divorce. i am both so enthralled but also in pain. save them please

there is actually so much more that happened in this ep but i'll prob talk about it tomorrow together with ep 3 because im sleepy eepy and i have to watch ep 3 that just came out too

OKAY OKAY TOXIC YURI TIME OKAY. gem NO DON'T DIVORCE HER but also I am SO here for it they should get more toxic but also PLEASE DON'T CAN YOU BE HAPPY PLEASE but also YESSSS TOXIC YURI

[rpmemesbyarat]

Stuff I’ve Said On Discord June-July 2024

“The good news is, this giant worm’s not homophobic.” “And not sexy enough, don’t forget not sexy enough.” “I don’t even know this game and I’m like wtffff” “Stinky!! I proclaim thee STINKY!!” "See, now it's NOT my sister's ass in the tiny thong leotard" “This is making way too much sense now, I'm scared.” “Put him in the stocks and display him before the town for his stink crimes!” “Oh how appropriate I’m scrolling Reddit and just passed the title “What is your “I dated/married a fucking idiot” moment?” “I mean they did not actually have sex” “THE WORM IS MARRYING HER” “And if you gotta steal 'em, take two!” “I imagine the sheer amount of shit packed into him adds a few inches height” “DONT STEAL THE MOON TRUST ME YOU DONT WANT THIS ASSHOLE” “Just baking you like bread!” “I need to put water dishes out for the wildlife.” “I absolutely support vegging out, you deserve all the decompression!!” “Some clients are...harder to spend time with, basically.” “HE SEES YOU THINKIN BOUT HIS BIG OLD PECS”

“Living in the moment, calling up the spawn of hell, blasting at it with machine guns, selling supplies to both sides. Beautiful youth.” “SILLY ME MAKING THE MOST LOGICAL ASSUMPTION” “I didn't know brows could ACTUALLY do that” "It's not that he's a homophobic caricature or anything. It's just. Literally everything else about him."

“WHY DOES THE COW LOOK LIKE THAT” “I genuinely think that bothering women who aren’t consenting to this shit/presumably aren’t into it is part of the thrill for these guys” “From what I understand, feet are next to genitals in the brain’s map so it’s easy for some wires to get crossed there and that’s why feet guys are so common” “CAUGHT IN A RAD BROMANCE!!!” "Water? Not the FUCK on MY watch"

“The smarter ones were always evil, the sweet ones were dumb as rocks and I loved them dearly” “Gerbils don't have a flared base.”

“I think they're less "domesticated" and more "contained"

[kindred-spirit-93]

Sup, it's me Astron

These are just some of my headcanons some don't have a basis in mythology unless I give context within brackets

• Demigod blood is copper/bronze in colour idk why it feels like a good middle between gold and red to me. Oh fun fact I can't find any classical sources saying that ichor was gold, it's usually just described as dark

• Persephone wears a crown with a narcissus/daffodil motive (it was the flower that Gaia grew to lure Persephone to the spot where Hades kidnapped her) also I just think it looks neat.

• I personally don't see Hades as pasty pale and weird I actually see him as quite handsome with a rich skin tone (I personally see him with a beard mainly because of that Serapis/Hades statue)

• Eileithyia is very physically similar to Zeus in stature and features. Childbirth is not for the faint of heart so I imagine her being a strong imposing presence with a no nonsense attitude and a booming laugh.

• Metis has a unibrow

• Demeter likes beer, a lot.

• Hestia was definitely involved with the whole Prometheus stealing fire thing

• Leto was the one who actively taught her children archery and Artemis how to hunt on Delos before she presented them to Zeus on Olympus

• Modern day Iris loves energy drinks and collects the pretty looking cans.

• Shape shifting to the gods is more akin to holding in your breath. Some gods are way better at it than others. Ares and Hephaestus are not

• Apollo and Hera have atleast once eaten a lettuce salad together and talked about cows, his hair and why Herakles sucks

• Apollo won't say it but he is really annoyed that people think that Ares was the patron of Sparta when it was actually him. He is a bit bitter about that lol

• Aphrodite was in the plumbing and sewage business under the name Cloacina

• Rhea's favourite grandchildren are Artemis and Dionysus

(I thought I sent this before but I might not of, I'm super unorganise)

(no worries XD yep this is the second one but u added rhea here so im answering this one since theyre essentially the same. u elaborated on the demeter erinyes referenced in her og ask so im adding it here!)

"Also unrelated, the myth where the Demeters Erinyes epithet came from is one of the few instances where we see the grief and rage from an assault victim. Most of the time it isn't acknowledged."

--

eileithyia!! i love that she takes after zeus omg!! daddy daughter duo

lmao hera hanging on by a thread XD

HADES IS NOT A SHEET OF PAPER HALLEUJAH AMEN!! sure the sun dont shine where hes at lol but hes not the bone white lord of the dead. also yes glorious hair and beard lol >:)

ill have you know i reacted very sensibly reading aphrodites hc. (genuinely clever) and the etymology is quite interesting! the more u know

go leto go!! quite possibly my favourite hc on here :D we need more hera and leto interactions!! idk why i think theyd have killer chemistry both figuratively and literally lol.

[gooopy]

can i know abt scully!!!

!!!!!! OUUPIOUOOUUUGHHH GHOOGGHHG !!!!!! TYYY FOR ASKING!!!!!!!!! scullys awesome he is an oc ive had for a bit and had a lotta time to develop and is also a revamped version of an old oc from when i was young trying to avoid making mary sues!! ohh i likesss him hes awesome

so scully is a he/him butch lesbian with soso many issues and problems and shit. he was raised by his pa, a stern bitter old veteran, and scullys ma ran off after he was born. his pa was hard on him, he wanted a son anyhow and when scully started acting masculine he thanked God for givin him a broken daughter and started teaching scully how to be a man. unfortunately this included such beautiful wonderful things such as 'men dont cry' and 'caring for animals makes you look weak' and stuff like that. as a kid scullys pa started getting sick, and they were too poor to do anything about it living in a shack that his pa built, so scully dropped out of middle school and picked up an apprenticeship with a local butcher!!!! his pa was bedridden, so scully took the laz-e-boy that his pa usually slept in, started working, started smoking, and started cooking. his pa told him that cooking was a womans job but he was busy dying in bed and scully was able to steal the scraps from his job so they got by. scullys dad died, and scully dug his pa's grave and nailed together two boards to make a cross and he didnt cry. he just started sleeping in the bed again

but thats all background shit because nowadays this is whats important: scully would throw himself into a volcano if a woman told him to. he falls so utterly head over heels for any gal who so much as looks his way its FUCKED. in school the gals realized this and got him beatin other people up for their lunch money and scully was happy to do it. nowadays he would give a lady the shirt off his back for a kiss blown his way. he holds doors for people and he stumbles over his words and he talks while he smokes by tucking the cigarette in the corner of his mouth. he cooks a lot now, the kitchen in that little shack slowly taking over the whole place like a mold, and he feeds the scraps and bone and gristle to the stray dogs and cats.

he was an angry cruel kid and he was tempered into a kind, awkward, super mega autistic adult. AND! he brews the scariest hooch ever in his house its so scary looking dont drink it. he can still hold his own in a fight but will just take the hits unless its to help a lady, in which case he is letting out years of trauma and anger on your face to turn it into ground beef. hes awesome he has so many issues and he sucks and i love him. i havnt managed to shove him fully into the ebautiful world of tf2 yet (he originated from disco elysium!) but i think it would be funny if hes dating scouts ma and now scout has a new stepdad who keeps trying to be his pal but doesnt got a handle on the whole 'fatherhood' thing as a concept yet.

I DONT HAVE AN UP TO DATE REF OF HIM BUT YOU MUST KNOW THAT HE HAS BIG BEAUTIFUL BROWN COW EYES !!!!!! hes awesome hes fucked up. i have another drawing of him beating someone up but ill post that seperately because its got blood

[bludrawscjrpcraft]

for today only: anyone is allowed to go to my base as long as you dont go in the main part and dont steal a bunch of shit from my basement

yall can use my enchanting room and the lapis in there, and yall can use my wheat farm IF YOU BREED MY COWS IN RETURN

i need more cows

also do not touch arti and aura unless youre just saying hi to them

if i find out anyone went in the above ground parts of my house i will start killing

[theuniverseawakens347]

Yal are some fucking children

EVERY FUCKING DAY YOU ANNOY ME W YOUR STUPIDITY AND LIES

LEE CLARITY NEVER HAD MY POLE I ASKED BEFORE I WENT IF I CUD PUT IT IN THE HOUSE - U SAID NO. NO PHONES OR LAPTOPS. ITS ALL MONITORED AND LOCKED AWAY. - SO BAYLEE FOR AND WITH LEE AS VIVICCA MY GOD MOM HOWD MY NUDES AND THE GIRLS PASS THEM AROUND FOR YOU!?

BITCH ASS CUNTS WHO ALL PARTOOK THEN “bitched me out for Baylee but she texting you what dumb shit to tell me so it looks like in front of Brooke cashay WILLINGLY FUCKED BASEL OR HAD SEX IN THE HOUSE W HER EX BF” - NO YOU BITCHES DID WEIRD SHIT - EVERYWHERE I FUCKING GO.

LEE YOU KNOW YOU FID EXTRA DUMB SHIT BEHIND HOWARDS BACK AND HOWARD I HATE YOU “teach her something different “ CAUSE YOU DOING THE MOST - WHEN I CAME OVER NOV 2023 and told you “lee be trying to put her hands on me when YOU walk out the room” you said hands in ur face “that’s NOT her character”

- YOU COVER AND LIE FOR HER EVEN AFTER GETTING EVIDENCE HI CAMERAS IN THE FUCKING HOUSE FROM HEATHERS MURDER AND HOWARD KNOWS - TOM.

Timothy peolko but it’s Lee confessing.

Anyways I DONT NEED TO BLOCK YOU TO LET YOU KNOW I DONT WANT TO TALK TO YOU WHILE YOU BEING CHILDISH TRISTAN. FUCKING RETARDED

I TOLD YOU WHAT I WANT YAL WANT TO BEEF FOR NO FUCKING RESON I DONT WANT TO BE AROUND ANY OF YOU WILLINGLY BEEFING FOR NO FUCKING REASON “it’s a due date” FUCK THE DATE UR RETARDED AND SO IS IT KEEPING ME HOMELESS TILL THEN - EVEN IN A HOMELESS SHELTER IM STILL FUCKING HOMELESS - SERVING FOOD IM NOT GOING TO FUCKING EAT ALLOWING 10 minute showers when I want longer - HELLO FUCKTARD CLARITY AGAIN LEE. FUCK YOU YOU NEED REHAB AND UR PUTTING IT IN ME. - ALL THE BUTCHES YOU HAD FAKE ME INDIA LOVE TO TEXT TRISTAN MY NUDES W THEIR DRUNK DRUG STORIES FOR LEE FUCKTARD GARLINGTON VIVICCA ANGELA BASKET KEKE

DICK WADS.

- I BLOCKED YOU 2020 BOTH LEE AND HOWARD BC UR FUCKING RETARDED W ADDICTION BEHAVIORS BUT CLAIM “sober” but always tell me “ the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome” - U TRYING TO MAKE ME LOOK INSANE CAUSE I WONT TAKE THE HOMELESS SHETLER - ITS INSANITY BO MATTER WHERE I GO AS LONG AS YOU INVOLVED IN MY LIFE - YOU TRYING TO GET TRISTAN TO DO THE DANCE W YOU LIKE HOWARD IN FULL BUT HES MORE ME THAN HOWARD IS - THATS THE SCARY FUCKING PARTS FOR YOU PARTENTS.

YOU SEE UR SELVES IN UR KIDS AND THE PPL YOU WILLINGLY FUCKED OVER AND WONT TURN YOURSELF INTO THE POLICE OR GET FUCKING ACTUAL HELP TO HEAL INSTEAD YOU SITTING THERE STILL POINTING THE FINGER AT SOMEONE ELSE AND TELLING THEM WHAT THEY NEED TO DO AND WORK ON

- LEE YOU WANTED TO BE A PARENT TO A BLACK CHILD .. bitch when YOU GON STOP FAILING ME YOU STUPID FUCKING ASSHOLE - Howard U JUST BE DOING SHIT TO GET BACK AT LEE FOR RUINING UR MARRIAGE W CHEATING ON YOUR WEDDING NIGHT DAY IDC AND STEALING MONEY OFF YOU or in ur name marriage etc AND THE BUSINESS YOU WORKED FOR - UR GOAL “she wants a child well make the child like me more than her” - CONGRATS YOU BOTH FUCKING FAILED AT WHAT YOU WANTED EXCEPT SUICIDE. YOU FUCKING IDIOTS.

- GET ME TO MY HOUSE OR A HOTEL WHERE I CAN SHOWER AND NOT BE BOTHERED BY FUCKING POINTLESS PPL DOING SHIT TO TEST ME FOR YOU - IMA GET WHAT I NEED NO MAYTER WHAT I CAN HANG FOR MY RIGHTFUL FAMILY DUE DAY BUT THE ISSUE IS YOU FUCKING COWS BRAIN BITCHES ILL ACTUALLY FORGIVE IMMA WANA BE BY MY SELF 2021 THANK YOU ASSWIPES - NOT WHAT YOU FUCKING WANTED BUT HAD YOU FUCKING TALKED TO ME UPFRONT IN FUCKING FULL WE WOULDN’T FUCKING BE HERE - LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE IMA GRIND HOW I DID 2020 WHEN SHANYCE AND JAMAL LEFT BUT YOU BITCHES PUTTING ME BACK WHERE I WAS COMFTY ALONE DUMBASS - I NEVR WANTED TO BE AROUND YOU THE WAY YOU WANA CODEPENDENCY ON ME.

- GOD GIVING YOU UR FUCKING LIFE PATH TO WALK AND BUILD UR KINGDOM - DROP A JEWL TO GET BACK IN TRACK WHEN YOU GET DISTRACTED…

But you satan ass bitch Lee and Howard w no fucking discipline want me and Tristan AND ALL MY RIGHTFUL FAMILY SMALL REGRESSED N HOMELESS WITHOUT LOVE LIKE YOU CAUSE YOU CANT COMPREHEND LOVE WAS A MATTER OF SELF - ALL MY FAMILY IS ME. YOU FUCKING DUMBASS BITCH .. the ones who AUTHENTICALLY LOOK LIKE ME AND SUPPORTING MAKING A MOCKERY OUT OF YOU.

India love and Coi LERAY a full fucking Lee “but Coi “ yeah bitch U SET ME UP FOR MURDER W THE INTENT TO REALLY FUCKING KILL ME AND BECOME ME - INDIA LOVE RETARTED ASS AND FUCK TARD LEE TO PASS TRISTAN AND FITKINGG ANOTHER BITCH WHO LOOK LIKE ME GOT MY FUCKING STEM CELLS IN THE BOTOX OR DOING CLOSE TO WHAT I DO .. BUT NOT ME.

And you my family Shanyce you really said “fucking cashay bf as her face and bri name over the internet to sell drugs is sooo cool and smart” - AJA MILES THINKING I DONT WANT YOU AROUND ME - OUR ARGUMENT 2021 WHEN YOU TRYING TO GET BACK COOL W ME AND I TOLD YOU FUCK YOU I HATE YOU YOU HAD NO REASON TO DO ANY OF THAT TO ME SO LEAAVE ME FOR GOOD BC YOU REALLY WEIRD MY NIGGA - U MAD AT ME CAUSE I TOOK YOU TO SEE “our homeless crack head mother” - WHAT UR GIVING ME SHANYCE NOT TALKING TO ME BUT ON INSTAGRAM FAKING ACCOUNTS OF ME YOU HATE AND BRI TO SELL AND BUY DRUGS OFF MY “friends” THEN SEND JAMAL YA NUDES KNOWING THAT MY EX WE LIVE WITH YOU STUPID BITCH ..

WHY WOULD YOU THINK THATS OKAY - NOT TALKING TO ME WHEN THE NIGGA WALK IN ON YOU NUDE .. how’s that my fault miss “I’m grown stop treating me like a kid” - FASHI BUT YOU ACTING LIKE A KID SO LEARN THE HARD WAY MISS “I wana move in w you and get our own spot together “ - cool bitch I would LOVE to live w my sister but get a job - Goes drug dealing and prostitution- THATS NOT WHAT I TAUGHT YOU ASSHOLE OR SPOKE TO YOU ABOUT

- I SOLD WEED FOR TRISTAN AND DID THAT SHIT BY MY LONELY BUT COUNTED MY 1/4 IN FRONT OF YOU CAUSE YOU SAID YOU ONLY SMOKE WEED - COOL I WANT MY OWN GROW OP ONE DAY SO LEARN THIS SHIT W ME SHANYCE .. - took you to one or two drop offs ass wipe. OF WEED ONLY.

PICK MY 1/2 lbs UP BY MYSELF. - NOT LETTING YOU HANG AROUND MORGAN ALONE BC YES I LOVE MY BEST FRIENDS BUT THEY BE ON WEIRD FUCKING SHIT WHEN IM NOT AROUND WHY WOULD I LEAVE MY LITTLE SISTER ALONE THAT I GOT LOVE FOR - EVEN IF IM DOING WHAT THEY DOING ON A 1/2 SCALE THEY DOING SOME EXTRA DUMBASS FUCKING SHIT AND IM NOT ABOUT TO BE RESPONSIBLE FOR YAL DOING THAT

- THE SHOP DROP FOR TRISTAN DALOE TATTOO BUT THE OTHER .. I CAME W SHANYCE MY SISTER UPSTAIRS whoever tattooing and the fat one on the couch Yal already giving me the “let’s fuck her eyes” 1/2 way - show you the weed you not feeling it and I’m not feeling you - U ALSO TESTING ME READING YO MINDS ASS WIPE - “you got anything else” yeah it’s in the car I’ll be back hold on - NEVER COME BACK CAUSE YOURE A WEIRD SET UP BITCH.

Shanyce how you here getting pimped over text - LEE GARLINGTON JAMAL SAME AS ME .. JAMAL HOW YOU POSING AS NIGGAS GETTING NUDES OFF MY SISTER - HI FOSTER CARE ROISIN PORTION OF PAYING HER RENT , huh Brianna “big sister” - NICE CHILD MOLESTATION AND PROSTITUTION- MAE PAYNE. JYNYVY SCOTT.

[cashaywallace]

Oh I hurt jessika feelings yesterday bc I exposed her

“She talked about my body”

Bitch no I didn’t

Again YOU MAD CAUSE I DONT FIT UR EXPECTATION OF GOD that’s one.

I’m not coddling your short comings - why you move out mamared- SHE WAS TRYING TO HELP YOU FROM BECOMING A HO. - HI CAM GRL BF.

And if you not sexting on camera you giving pretty girls a naturally mean AND “I’m better than you just cause light skin” aesthetic - red not racist she prolly said some weird shit cause you being weird about yo heritage mixing - finding yourself on a 1/2 scale of black and white- I fucking get it but YOU ZEALOUS AND DONT GOT REASON TO BE- ya looks is average why you use all that make up - UR ACTUALLY VERY FUCKING PRETTY BUT YOUR ATTITUDE IS A REFLECTION OF HOW MUCH POINTLESS MAKE UP YOU BE USING ON A DAILY. - mama red not crazy bitch Yal from the south HAY BLACK N WHITES GET ALONG - what is you doing jessika.. - dating a white boy who wana be black - Yal perfect for each other - YA BOTH MISSED THE MESSAGE GIVEN TO YOU IN YO UPBRINGING AND IT SHOW IN YA DAMN CARS - “we trying to sow both worlds go together” BUT YOU DOING A YOUTUBE ROSE OF KINGSNQWEENS BLACK GIRLS W WHITE BOYS ARE BETTER // BETTER TAKEN CARE OF - NO YOURE PREJUDICE TURNED RACIST - congrats that’s sad. Why YOU GOT KICKED OUT THE HOUSE AND STEALING OFF RED NOW. W/O BF KNOWLEDGE. - UR A SCAMMER DUMBASS. … THE REST OF GIRLS WHO LOOK LIKE YOU YOU IN COMPETITION TO BE BETTER THAN VS FINIDING INSPIRATION TO LOVE YOURSELF - why you got goldenkurls leg tattoos and India love hand but Marie nails 🙂🖕 - UR RUDE N LOST N NASTY INSIDE N CALL IT CUTE - JASMEAN ( why is that yo fucking name - bc I got long hair than most black girls 😒 - why corri leave you ( besides me liking his photos when YOU was stalking me 💋 HI DADDY - SINCE YOU PETTY DUMBASSES )

You trying to become em / ME - BLASPHEMY KARMA. - where’s UR BRAINS / individually … what man told you he need you slutty clothing and long nails n toes done 24/7 w ya hair did - INSTAGRAM FAKE WORLD COATING YO BANK ACCOUNT. - ROBBING THE WHITE HOUSE. - YA DONT CHECK THE CAR FAX

“Well why she get to post her body photos”

BC THERES CLEARLY CONFIDENCE N SELF LOVE IN MINE. IM IN COMPETITION WITH MYSELF THE GIRL IN THE MIRROR TO BE MY BEST FUCKING SELF W SELF LOVE IN TACT ALWAYS.

Went from scrawny little kid ( yes we got caught up on is my ass this or that enough) THEN I BUILT MY BODY I WORKED FOR IT HARD N SHOWED THE PROGRESSION ALWAYS.

You bitches say you in the gym - LIFTING 5 lbs or over doing shit with dumb form saying that’s how you got ur OH SO OBVIOUS ENHANCER ASSES. - WHY YA QUADS XARRYING YA ASS BUT UR MEAT OF THE LEG DONT EXIST - WHERES the real support - not ur core either.

T.hooww you got WASH FLAT ABS … WHERES UR SURROUNDING MUSCLES - you use enhancers not weights to get it

Then you in competition w women who don’t even fit in the lane you trying to take over 🤯

When a nigga and a female really on they shit and sit back and obverse that it really shows Yal lacking brains so you OVER HIGHLIGHT qualities you deem gon be long lasting to a man // woman - why ya relationships ALWAYS FAILING. - WHO WALKS AWAY FIRST , ME.

- a bitch been at the lib for 10 months and ain’t cracked a single book open here or Ventura county

- what was that day Obama I wrote the dna malfunction in medical research and the hydrogen bomb in space you put in my fucking head to make me SPECIAL NEEDS AND SEEM LIKE A CRACK HEAD - FOR THE BOOK WORM BITCHES BUT STOP DOING THE MOST 24/7 SHOWING OF YA BODY IN A WAY THAT DONT BALANCE YOU.

- YAL WANT ME A LACKING HO CLEARLY , IVE TACKLED EVERYTHING IN THE UNIVERSE AND SMSHED IT SO NOW IM BORED MAKING FUN OF WHY YO HISTORY STUCK ON COWS BRAIN REPEAT

- if you see me post a body photo now it’s MANY REASONS BEHIND IT 1. I’m bored and reminiscing 2. I’m bored yo hos is tired and played out 3. I’m bored KAMALA TAKING HER SWEET DAMN FUCKING TIME. 4. IM BORED TRISTAN A SLOW OVER PLANNED LOSER 5. IM BORED LEE N HOWARD IS SLAVE OWNERS HOW MUCH DEEPER WE NEED TO GO 6. IM BORED PAULA A LOSER N TRYNA HOLD ON 7. TAYLOR SR DONE. 8. IM BORED WTF IS YOU NIGGAS SCARED FOR 9. IM BORED YOU WANT ME FRIENDS W A HOMELESS MAN TO RAPE ME 🫤 BITCH THATS NOT MY BABY DADDY TF MENTAL ILLNESS YOU GOT. 10. IM BORED SO IM SHOWING WHO IN A “aspiring limelight” NEED A DAMN PSYCHIATRIST 11. IM BORED SHOWING REAL MEN A REAL EQUAL WOMAN ON THEY ARM 12. IM BORED SHOWING WOMEN HOW TO BALANCE THEY BEAUTY AND BRAINS 13. IM BORED SHOWING GOD DONT LIKE UGLY N ITS NOT ALL THE GAYS* 14. IM BORED AND SHOWING HOW TO BE COPESTETIC IN ALL ENVIRONMENTS WITH WHAT YOU DEEM DONT GO TOGETHER BUT FIT TOGETHER WHEN YOU GET OUT YA BOX 15. IM BORED SHOWING HOW AMERICA IS A ADDICT STATE ADDICT TO PAIN N MISERY AND CODEPENDENT ON SAYING SOMEONE ELSE THE FUCKING BAD GUY

- YOU HO•es NEED WONDER WOMAN BUT YOU CHICKEN

- the aliens is bored waiting to eat and you standing next to em 😹😹😹😹😹🤯🤯🤯🤯

[heartthrobxhook]

His face flushes red as Xen just picks him up and begins to carry him, though he wouldn't voice any protest. "You did say you weren't familiar with sailing, I can teach you. I'm sure it'll be fun for you to learn something new." That would be an accomplishment, teaching a millenia old being something they dont already know.

"I have some books and I'm sure we'll be able to steal some new ones." Killian said as he rested his head on Xen's shoulder. "What are we going to feed you? There aren't cows on the ocean... I guess we could catch you some sharks? There's some pretty big whales out there."

ᒥ🌌ᒧ—        The teasing earns a soft huff of amusement and a small smile. "I'm certain you can handle yourself well, Killian. I'd just...be able to rest easier if I was with you." Xeniarth moves, adjusting his hold on Killian to carry the human when he stands.

"Just my books are all I have, in truth. The clothes I wear now are of magic, an illusion like the form I have taken. However, I have...far too many books to take them all with me." He'd have to sort through which he wanted most. Xeniarth walks, carrying Killian with ease down the street towards the Guild. "As for informing someone, I'll be sure to leave a note." He should speak with someone, but he didn't want their opinions or disagreement on the matter. So, a note would suffice.